By Melissa Chacon
‘Tis the season to be jolly, but for many Americans, it is also the season to be stressed out. According to a study done by the American Psychological Association (APA), more people are inclined to feel that their stress increases, rather than decreases, around the holidays. In fact, 38% of people studied felt that their stress levels dramatically increased during the holiday season.
There are many factors that may lead to the heightened feelings of stress and anxiety during the holidays; money concerns, planning trips, cooking for a crowd, decorating, bad weather, and fitting it all in around a work schedule. It can be a daunting thought, how can I get this all done, in a short amount of time, on a budget? Divorces, blended families, and annoying relatives can also factor in and diminish the holiday spirit. The urge to over commit to make everyone happy might lead to some very unhappy feelings.
So how can we bring the joy back and really get into the holiday spirit? Here are five tips that can help fight the holiday frenzy and put you back in the holiday spirit.
- Budget, Budget, Budget
Money is a big factor in most people’s holiday stress. Wondering how to pay for all the gifts without maxing out credit cards, but still making loved ones happy? This is where budgeting comes in, find out how much you can afford and stick to it. I have a huge family, and three kids of my own, every year around October it suddenly dawns on me: I have less than three months to make travel arrangements for Thanksgiving and shop for all the holiday gifts and food. This is also when I start to feel a little sick to my stomach.
A realistic budget can help. Also, its key to remember that it’s ok to not buy everything on your family’s wish list. One year when my oldest was 7 the number one gift request was NFL tickets to see the Patriots play in Foxborough. With tickets over 200 dollars a person, and plane tickets to Massachusetts from New Mexico, it was completely unrealistic for us to get my 7-year-old his most desired gift. But you know what? He was perfectly happy opening his Tom Brady jersey on Christmas morning.
Since my family is a little bigger: Three children, six nephews, and four nieces, four siblings, and four sets of parents between my husband and I, we have a lot of gifts to purchase each Christmas. We decided a few years ago that it’s not worth it to go broke just for Christmas gifts. We set our budget at one thousand dollars (which we have scrimped and saved for all year) and we do not go over it.
Sometimes this means we need to be a little creative, DIY gifts (Pinterest for the win!), black Friday sale shopping, Amazon deals of the day, but every year we get it done and the feeling of joy when we give our family their gifts is amazing. - Don’t over-commit
Over-commitment affects a lot of people during the holiday season. It is the holidays and you want to be able to see everyone but it’s okay to say NO! Many years ago, when my older boys were babies, my husband and I ran ourselves ragged trying to see the whole family on Christmas day. We woke up at 6 a.m. to rush to his grandparents for Christmas morning breakfast, then it was off to his mother’s for brunch. Next, we packed up the kids and drove thirty miles to see my mother and stepfather and nieces and nephews for lunch. By late afternoon we were summoned to my grandparents’ house to exchange gifts, and lastly to his father’s house for Christmas dinner, which was another 20 miles away.
We didn’t get home until after 9 p.m. and we were all exhausted, grouchy, and stressed from rushing around all day. That was the last year we did that. We decided it was okay not to see the whole family in one day, we now spread out our Christmas activities over multiple days. It is also ok to not see friends or family that have a negative impact on your mental health. - Get Moving
The holiday season is a time when many fall into bad habits. We don’t eat right, we drink a little more than usual, we skip our exercise routines (because who has time to go to the gym when there is gifts to buy and pies to bake?) and we definitely aren’t getting enough sleep. According to the Anxiety and Depression Association of America, exercise is considered vital for maintaining mental fitness, it can reduce stress, decrease overall levels of tension, elevate and stabilize mood, and improve sleep.
So, get moving! No need to train for the Olympics, but a brisk evening walk, a water aerobics class, or a quick jog on the treadmill will help with those stress levels. There are even aerobic activities to do while watching television in the evenings. Try to get in thirty minutes of aerobic exercise a day to elevate mood. - Schedule some ‘me’ time
During the holidays, it’s easy to forget about ourselves, it is the season of giving after all. However, it is important to schedule some down time in order to cope with stress and anxiety brought on by the frenzy that accompanies the holidays.
Relaxing hot bubble baths, scented candles, and practicing mindful meditation are some of my favorite ways to unwind during the holiday season. It is also helpful to disconnect from technology and curl up with a hot cup of tea and a good book, take a nap, have a movie marathon, or sleep in.
Self-care is an important factor for mental health, so it is especially important to make that ‘me’ time during the holiday season, even if it needs to be scheduled. - Acknowledge and accept your feelings
Peace, comfort and joy- this is what is expected during the holidays. Unfortunately for many, it’s a time where past losses hit us hard.
Families bicker, our feelings get hurt, and our depression creeps in. We might feel lonely or overwhelmed, sad or anxious, and that is perfectly ok. Take time to acknowledge why you feel this way, remember it’s okay to take time to cry or to grieve. Accept that sometimes these feelings will surface, nobody is 100% happy all the time, and just because the world is celebrating around us does not mean that our feelings are silly or invalid.
Take time to feel these feelings, and if it all becomes a little too overwhelming talk to a friend, family member, counselor, or therapist.
** This article was submitted to HoundBytes from the Feature Writing course this Fall 2019 Semester **
